For Auld Lang Syne
by janie17
Summary: Christmas one-shot. Jack dedicates his Christmas Eve to finding out what has Ianto so upset after he storms out of the conference room.


AN: I started this back in December but got majorly distracted by other plot bunnies. It started out being a way different story, but I lost control about 400 words in and so this is what happened. Hope you like it!

Disclaimer: As always, I do not own Torchwood no matter how hard I wish I did.

* * *

"Well, I, for one, can't believe Jack is giving us off for Christmas! I mean, all of us!" Gwen chirped excitedly as the team sat in the conference room. It was one of the only places in the Hub that managed not to be horridly drafty and damp, the other cozy place being Jack's bedroom, and that was hardly an appropriate place for a team meeting.

"Am I not a benevolent master?" Jack responded regally. Ianto snorted a laugh. "Oh shut up. Besides," he said, voice once again adopting its usual tone, "everyone knows that if something is going to happen on Christmas, it is going to be in London."

"What do you mean? We've got the rift, not London." Gwen's eyes were wide with confusion.

"Giant space ship blown up over London on Christmas day; replica of the Titanic nearly crashing into Buckingham Palace. Ring any bells?"

"Rhys said that was a hoax. Just some idiot trying to make a buck off public hysteria."

"Rhys is an idiot," Owen shot back in response.

"Shut up, Owen. Nobody asked you."

"Shut up, Owen. Nobody asked you," he parroted back, mockingly.

"Oh, that's real mature."

"You want mature? Fine, I'll show you something really mature, love. My flat. Tonight."

"As if!" Gwen shrieked. Tosh and Ianto exchanged a look.

"Alright children. That's enough." Jack said firmly. They stopped bickering. "Much better." Jack turned to speak to Ianto.

"Bitch," muttered Owen under his breath.

"Wanker," Gwen shot back quietly.

"Guys, seriously! You are going to give me a migraine," Ianto snapped.

"Oh no!" Owen mocked. "We've gone and upset Mummy too!" The team snickered, though Jack tried to cover his laugh with a cough as Ianto stared daggers at him.

"Go on," Ianto said, voice dripping with snark. "Keep laughing. But we'll see who's laughing when you are all on decaf for a month." He stood quickly from his chair. "Happy Christmas," he snapped before sweeping out of the room.

Jack sighed. "Owen, you are truly an asshole."

"We all know this. But I wasn't forcing you to laugh."

"Do you want to start the new year on decaf or do you want me to go do damage control?" Jack snapped, standing from his seat. Owen didn't answer, looking a bit sheepish. "That's what I thought." Before leaving the room he paused and addressed the rest of the team. "Why don't you all just head out early, it is Christmas Eve after all and the rift is quiet. Have a very merry Christmas, guys."

TWTWTW

Ianto looked up, hearing a chuckle coming from the doorway. Jack was leaning against the door jamb with his hands in his pockets, just as Ianto had known he would be. "You starting the festivities early?" he asked, cocking an eyebrow.

The younger man knocked back the last of the whiskey in his glass before responding. He was seated in Jack's chair, feet on the desk that had been recently cleared of paperwork, holding the glass in his lap. "Well, sir, it is a holiday. One is allowed to break the usual societal rules about drinking in the daytime. Besides," he swung his feet to the floor, suddenly understanding why Jack sat that way so often. It made him feel just a little bit cool and a tad devil-may-care. "I thought you liked it when I loosen up a bit." This was accented by his movements to loosen his tie. Ianto stood and made his way across the small office; he was met halfway by Jack who was looking at him with a striking combination of lust and amusement.

"You are very right," he chuckled. "I do like it when you loosen up a bit." He reached out, pulling the other man closer by his belt. "But I prefer to do the loosening." Ianto sucked in a breath at the unexpected movement of his person, half-smiling as he realised that Jack still had not moved his hand away from his belt buckle.

Ianto shifted closer, one hand coming to rest on the older man's waist, the other on the back of his neck. He pulled him forward, tilting his own head slightly, so that their lips came together. "I'm sure that can be arranged," he muttered into the kiss."

"Glad to hear it," Jack purred back, "But first," he nibbled Ianto's lower lip, begging entrance. The younger man opened his mouth, eager to battle Jack for dominance of the kiss. He groaned as Jack pulled away unexpectedly. "Two things."

"What?" he asked slightly out of breath.

"Before we get around to taking advantage of this alone time, there are two things I have to say." He chuckled as Ianto failed to conceal his impatience. "First, I'm sorry for letting Owen talk to you like that. It was incredibly rude, even for him. And second, what's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong, Jack. They were giving me a headache, is all."

"I can tell something is eating at you, Ianto. You can tell me." Jack brought a hand up to rest on the younger man's cheek, thumb skimming gently across his cheek bone. Ianto huffed in annoyance, turning away. "Ianto." Jack's voice was stern as he gripped his shoulders, spinning him back to face him. "What is going on with you today?"

"I'm not in the mood to be interrogated, sir," he said sharply.

Jack cursed under his breath. "Christ, Ianto. This is not an interrogation. This is me asking as a friend and lover what has got you so upset."

Shaking off the older man's grip on his arms, Ianto snapped, "Leave it alone, will you?" before storming from the office.

TWTWTW

When Jack found Ianto, he was standing in the Plass by the railing, staring out at the ocean irritably and clutching a coffee in his hands, devoid of gloves. The older man remained silent, watching for a few moments until the right words—words that wouldn't further upset his lover—came to him. He had purposely waited for a few minutes before grabbing his great coat and checking the cctv feed for where the young man had gone. He was relieved to see that he hadn't gone far to cool off.

"I can hear you thinking from here," Ianto said suddenly, causing Jack to startle slightly. "If you're gonna say something, say it." He turned, back to the water, as Jack stepped forward, wrapping a scarf around the younger man's neck.

"It's cold out here."

"Well, winter in Cardiff," Ianto replied drily.

Jack sighed. "I'm sorry if I did or said something to upset you. I shouldn't have pushed. If you wanted to talk, then you would. Obviously."

"Obviously," the younger man repeated sternly, despite the softening look around his eyes. "Thank you for this," he said almost gently, fingering the scarf.

"You're welcome." He took a tentative step forward. When Ianto did not draw away in response, Jack closed the gap between them, wrapping his arms tight around him, tucking his face into the crook of Ianto's neck. He kissed the space above the younger man's collar. Ianto sighed before sliding his arms around Jack's waist. He shivered slightly against the cold. "Will you come back inside? We can finish off that bottle in my office," Jack asked, pulling away slightly to look him in the eye. "I'm not gonna make you talk if you don't want to."

"All right," Ianto said with an air of resignation. He didn't protest as Jack took hold of his hand, a welcome warmth as they crossed back towards the Hub.

TWTWTW

Ianto shed his coat and suit jacket, hanging them carefully. Unbuttoning his waist coat with one hand, he looked at Jack as the man tossed his own coat onto his desk chair. As the older man reached for the bottle of whiskey and two glasses, Ianto spoke, "Would you mind if we had coffee instead?"

Jack smiled. "Sure. Not a problem. As long as you can fix it, that is."

"Of course, sir." A hint of amusement crept into his eyes. The older man was relieved to see some of his black mood failing. Ianto headed into the small kitchen to prepare their coffee, which was had in companionable silence.

After handing Jack a second cup, he dropped on to the couch on his back, head resting in the older man's lap. There was a wrinkle between his eyebrows and a small frown bending his lips.

"I know I said I wasn't going to do this, but are you alright?" Jack asked, transferring his coffee to his right hand so he could run his fingers through Ianto's hair.

The younger man sighed, closing his eyes. "Probably not," he muttered blandly.

"Fair enough. Will you tell me what's going on when you're ready to talk?" Ianto's mouth twitched slightly but he didn't respond. Jack took a sip from his rapidly cooling coffee, deciding to wait him out.

After minutes of silence, the younger man spoke. "Mam died on Christmas Day." He said it quietly, matter-of-fact, with little emotion in his voice.

"Shit, Ianto. I'm sorry. I didn't know."

"You wouldn't. I altered my personal file before asking for a job here."

Jack sighed, brushing a stray hair from the younger man's forehead. "I'm not too terribly surprised that you took that out of the file. How old were you?"

"Eleven." Reaching up, he intertwined his fingers with the ones that had previously been carding through his hair. "She asked Rhiannon to make breakfast because she didn't feel well. An hour later, she was dead." Ianto spoke with a sad detachment that shook the older man to the core. "Tad made us open our presents that night before bed, saying that's what Mam would have wanted. Rhi cried herself to sleep."

"Oh my god." Coaxing him to sit up, Jack pulled the younger man into his arms, his coffee sitting abandoned on the floor next to his feet. "I am so sorry, Ianto. Thank you for telling me, that must have been so tough on you." He felt the younger man take a shuddering breath and held him tighter.

"If you would, please don't tell the team. I don't want to give them a reason to pity me further," he said softly.

"I won't. It's not mine to tell." He pulled away, giving Ianto's shoulder a reassuring squeeze. "Now, what's this about them pitying you?" he asked with a scowl.

"They went from hating me for almost getting them killed, to feeling sorry for me. I suppose it's better, but only marginally."

"Why didn't you say something?" The younger man gave him an incredulous look.

"We have more important things to deal with, day to day." Jack scoffed, receiving a hard look in response.

"What, like saving the world? Big deal. I helped save the _universe_ once. That was important. I'll tell you about it some time." He sighed, putting one arm back around the younger man, kissing his temple as he pulled him closer. Ianto rolled his eyes, but was unable to conceal the fond smile that crossed his face. "They don't pity you. Well, maybe Gwen, she does love a project. Heck, depending on the day, she pities me too. But the others: Owen doesn't pity anyone but himself, and I think Tosh is still in awe of you after the incident out in the country. There's no pity there." Ianto sighed, muttering his half-hearted agreement.

Jack stood, pulling his young lover up with him. "Come on, I wanna show you something."

"What is it?" Ianto asked as he was lead down to the shooting range.

"I was going to wait till tomorrow, but I changed my mind." Jack unlocked the back room where the more volatile weapons were stored. He flipped on a light, crossing to the back of the room and retrieving a small, festively wrapped box from a shelf. "Ya see, I know you said no gifts, so I had to find someplace you weren't likely to find it." He handed the other man the box. "Open it."

Carefully, Ianto peeled away the tape, one piece at a time, gently unfolding the metallic paper. Inside was what looked like a box that one would get in a jewellery store. Opening the black velvet box, he gasped. Inside sat a gold stopwatch with a matching chain. He gently freed it from its cushioning, turning it over carefully in his hands. Looking up at the older man who was giving him a hopeful look, he said in a hushed tone, "Jack, it's beautiful."

"I'm glad you like it," he replied, grinning and giving off waves of relief. "No lie, I was a little worried. I thought you might be peeved because I got you something when I said I wouldn't. And it was kind of expensive, so I really don't want you to feel like you need to get me something in return, because I have you and that's more than enough. And I don't know if you saw," Jack reached over, turning the watch so Ianto was looking at the back, "but I got it engraved. I hope it's not too cheesy."

Inscribed on the back, in a small, elegant script were the words:

_For you I would stop time. _

Ianto was speechless, looking from the watch, to Jack, then back again. "I…I…" He took a deep breath. "I don't know what to say, Jack. It's…It's lovely. I love it." Placing it back into the box, he closed it, setting it on the nearest shelf. He reached out, pulling the older man closer until they were nearly touching. Leaning forward he kissed him firmly, attempting to pour all of his gratitude into it. Pulling away, he said softly, "Thank you."

"You're welcome."

"It's perfect." Jack shuffled slightly, uncomfortable standing under Ianto's adoring gaze and feeling suddenly bashful.

"You don't think the engraving was too much? Like, over the top cheesy?"

Ianto smiled. "Of course it's cheesy. But that's what makes it perfect. What was it Rhys called you the other day? Captain Cheeseball?" Jack scowled playfully, receiving a smirk in return, and allowed himself to be pulled into a hug.

TWTWTW

Nestled comfortably with Jack under the bed covers, Ianto sighed happily.

"What?" the older man inquired, mid-yawn.

"Nothing."

"Oh, don't start that again! I can't do more than one non-work related argument in a day." Jack was dead serious underneath his playful tone.

Ianto rolled his eyes. "I'm just happy. It's nice to be happy at Christmas. I'd forgotten what it was like." Jack tightened his arm around the younger man's waist, pulling them closer together. He kissed the patch of skin where shoulder meets neck.

"I'm glad you're happy, Ianto," Jack murmured into his ear. "You deserve to be happy more often."

"I'm happy enough. I like my job well enough, even if it is tough sometimes. I have a couple of good people I can count on that I consider friends. And, I've got you. You make me happy." He took hold of the hand resting against his stomach, lacing their fingers together.

"You deserve more than that. More than me. A real life. A family."

"Jack," Ianto frowned, rolling over to face him. "If having a 'real life' means not having you, then I don't want it. I'll stick with the weird hours and the aliens, thank you very much." When Jack didn't respond, he rolled over, propping himself on one elbow slightly, and frowned. "You do believe me that I'd rather have you than a normal life, yeah?" he asked.

"I know. I'm just still beating myself up over earlier. I should have known what was wrong." Jack scowled.

The younger man sighed. "You couldn't have known, and I didn't tell you. It's all right."

"But that's the thing! You should have felt like you could tell me!" The older man groaned, half turning to lay on his back, one arm flung up to cover his eyes.

"You think I didn't feel comfortable telling you because of something you did."

"Pretty much."

"You're wrong."

Jack lifted his arm to look at his young lover. "What was that?"

"I said you're wrong. If I had decided to talk to anyone, it would have been you." He sighed sadly. "Rhi and I don't talk about her. We don't talk about much at all, really, so I'm just not used to saying anything about it. In London it was too busy to worry about the holidays. I didn't ever have to face it. But now I'm in Cardiff again, with downtime, and people I care about and it just got a little too much."

Jack cupped Ianto's cheek with a hand. "Will you try to let me know when things get like that again so I can help you?"

Ianto half smiled, leaning into the touch. "I can try."

"Good, because I hate seeing you like that, so sad and angry. It makes me feel helpless because I can't fix it. And I don't like to feel helpless."

"I know you don't," the younger man chuckled. He ran his thumb against the captain's slightly pouting lips. He glanced over at the clock on his bedside table. It read 12:01 am. Leaning over, forearm moving from resting on Jack's chest, to beside it on the bed, he kissed him. "Happy Christmas."

Jack's hand snaked into Ianto's hair, pulling him back down. After a slow, leisurely kiss, he pulled away. "Happy Christmas, Ianto."

* * *

AN: Leave me a review and let me know what you thought!


End file.
